(Sep 30, 2008)
I need to postpone my tattoo session. I feel so sad now but then again, if I don't have enough money for my FYP I'll be even more sad.

It's still seems like a battleground at work now. Everyone is so busy. I am at Wishing Well instead of the shoot because they have not enough hands to go around. And up the spiral stairs is so shiok. I can fall asleep anytime.

And I got Heroes S3 from Warren which is shiok shiok shiok. I do not need to keep buffering the video online already!

Alright my work is done up here. I shall go have a nice long pee and back to the warzone downstairs. 12 more days left here )): emo. BUT, I STILL WANT MY PUBLIC HOLIDAYS TOMORROW! I NEED TO SLEEEEEP BADLY.


& In case you forgot how I look like,



Still as pretty, cute and smiley as ever ((:
()
jacky. says: (1:12:42 AM)
pls. just be the director.
jacky. says: (1:12:51 AM)
concentrate.
(Sep 28, 2008)
Kat Von D is sexy. Period.





And while looking through her photos, I saw Beckham's and thus I went searching for his photos as well and damn it, I wanna fuck him too. BALLS.





They are hot hot hot and so are their tattoos. I really like Beckham's because every tattoo means something. I don't know about Kat's but I remember one of her tattoo is a portrait of her mother. Which is awsome. Truly "always with me", no?

I am so fasinated with typography & potraits tattoos now. And maybe geisha because the colors of their tattoos are always so vividly nice. Nah, I am not going to get inked with a geisha. No reason for me to do that anyway unless I become a geisha in the future which is highly impossible, so no geisha but I am attracted by the colors.

KAT VON D IS HOT. I KEPT SCROLLING UP WHILE TYPING JUST TO TAKE A LOOK AT HER PHOTO (I JUST DID THAT AGAIN). FUCK. I SO WANNA GET INKED BY HER. WHY IS SHE NOT COMING TO THE TATTOO CONVENTION THIS COMING JAN. Chris Garner is coming. No, no money to get inked by him.

Anyway, I just found this sentence that I forgot. It's a sentence from Five People You Meet In Heaven by Mitch Albom, Hating is a weapon that attacks the person who harmed us. But hatred is a curved blade. And the harm we do, we do to ourselves. I just happened to skim through JY's blog and saw that sentence.

Mitch Albom is an awesome writer. Other than his topselling Tuesdays with Morrie, they are also Five People You Meet In Heaven and For One More Day. Awesome book, with very meaningful sentences you can apply in life.

Alright. It's time for some Torey Hayden before I sleep. It's already 3.30am man. And I'm going to gym wit Cynthia tomorrow!
(Sep 27, 2008)
I waited for cab from 9.30am till 11am yesterday. And it started pouring halfway and I was drenched. Tried calling for cab and damn it, all lines are engaged. I was so angry I went home to dry my hair and then took a bus to work. So instead of reaching work at 10am, I reached at 12pm.

Helped out in Invy's photo shoot again and it was pretty boring because we have to keep sitting around and waiting since it wasn't a very busy shoot. It was Stan's last day so had to wait for him to come back from location photo shoot. Had dinner at Palm before we all went home. Damn, gonna miss having that irritating voice at work. Haha.

3 more weeks left with SG as an intern. And then we will all be back for FYP which is a love-hate situation. Damn it. I really don't wanna think about it. My story is not even finalised yet, needless to say about the script and storyboard. Bitchy.

Anyway, I have decided to get myself a tattoo before FYP. Probably next week but that's kinda fast. Was surprised that my parents actually allowed me to get it. I mean, I'm gonna do something which means something to me so there's nothing negative about it. Still searching for the right fonts to use, the right place to tattoo, the right time, the right person to tattoo and wha, it's a lifetime thing man. But I am going to do it anyway.

I was supposed to clean up my room at 3pm and go for a run at 7pm today and it's already 6.02pm and I am still laying down on my bed chatting, blogging and surfing around. BLAH.
(Sep 24, 2008)
if everyone cared and nobody cried
if everyone loved and nobody lied.
if everyone shared and swallowed their pride
we'd see the day when nobody died.


sometimes, i just want to ignore everybody and hope that they will mind their own business and just leave me alone as well. but at the end of the day i know that they mind because they care and i feel touched and happy and guilty because they got it from me just by showing they care. so, for all those who cared and i've shunned away from, i still love you luh!

they are happily enjoying in dublin and some in hong kong and look at us, slogging our ass off at work. stan's and warren's call time tomorrow is 5.45am and thank god mine is 10am. but for the pass few days it was like 7am, 6am and 8am. so things are pretty packed at work not and i am very excited about GP this weekend because it's the first night race and it's happening in singapore!

anyway i tried to tan myself on tuesday during location shoot and walao i didn't even turn red please ):

baby's physically sick and i feel very heart pain.

alright. shoot tomorrow so i guess i better turn in soon. i am looking after baby now (:
(Sep 21, 2008)
NEHNEH IS BACK!
()
Carmen the babe helped me deleted all those messages I would never have bear to delete this whole life. I sat there, watching her scroll through the messages, one by one, marked and finally, the delete button.

A final ending to it and now, whatever happens between whoever and whoever is so none of my business.

To the silent reader who might still be reading, I do not want to lose a good friend because of those harsh words I've said that day yet I'm too prideful to do anything about it. I'm sorry and take care for I won't appear in your life nor disturb your peaceful life anymore.



I still miss Ngakus many many. I will rape him the next time I see him.
I am turning in now and hopefully I will dream of him and have a nice long sex with him in my dream. Oh yes, wet dream.
(Sep 20, 2008)
The first time I cried on a public transport was when I first heard about the news regarding Joseph. I remember I was so desperate I called Dominic and he was cooling me down. And then I met up with Cherissa and she was there with me the whole day.

And this time round, I was on the bus, alone. Shroomy the second accompanied me. Handphone went flat and I can't turn to anybody. I offered myself some tissue and let the beer do it's wonder. So I slept through the rest of the journey home.

And when I reached my void deck, I saw Tommy there. I was messaging him halfway when my battery went flat so he waited for me under my block since then. And I started bursting into tears the moment I saw him. He sent me home when I cooled down. He jumped when Station barked at him and I started laughing. My first laughter of the day. Thank you for everything Brother.

What a wonderful journey home.
(Sep 19, 2008)
"Stop saying you've tried when you didn't even bother to."

That was the only sentence Josh replied me this morning after sending him a 6 pages long message last night. But I guess he made his point and brought it across to me.

Whatever it is, I'm pretty much happy with what I am now even though I wished that I was still the good old fiona who's bubbly and goes around laughing non-stop (like what many remembered) with anyone, anywhere. Now, I choose who I laughed with, who to joke with and who to hang out with. It's tiring to try to be someone you are not but there's a point in life whereby you will undergo changes due to difficult circumstances. That's how a person grow. Try to see things in my POV and you will know why I changed.

I heard the most hurtful things from this friend because he was half drunk. Many might not know that I was pretty hurt by those words but in fact, I am very much hurt by it. I know I can be straightforward at times saying things impulsively but I didn't know that he would have think that I am someone untrustable, someone who broadcast secrets and someone who doesn't think before she talks. I mean, a drunkard man always speaks the truth, no?

And next, well, some might witness the whole fiona-crying-during-DYB scene and was pretty shocked. That was one of my lowest point in life. I was trying to love someone and hate the other at the same time. I tried to love and I loved. I tried to hate but I can't. I tried to ignore what I saw, I tried to act as though I know nothing but oh well, like what that friend said, I'm someone who talks without thinking. So I whined and complained to some and most of the time, I just kept everything to myself.

And lastly, that fateful night out at Cartel for cakes with two other friends. How an unintentional from a special friend broke me. I felt so lousy. I swear I could burst into tears on the spot after he said those words: "I look down on smokers because of you." It really broke me. It really did. Although I didn't really point or say out how hurt I was. It hurt more than what the previous friend said about me. And following that night, everything just changed.

Three points. Three is enough to explain to you and whoever is wondering why is Fiona so different today like she used to. After everything, I knew that distance is the only way out. So I tried to distance myself from most of the usuals (if you know). The first step, stop hanging out and slowly as the time pass by, there's less topic, less conversation and in the end you get it; distance. I was all out to distance myself from everyone. Trust me, it's not easy especially for someone like me who loves going out and hanging out with my friends. But I succeeded and now, it's so difficult for me to turn back.

No, M, we do not need to talk things out. And please don't blamed yourself for anything that happened in my life. Sorry I have to say this, but we are not that close to begin with. He might be one of the reason why I treated you this way but like what I've mentioned, I was just distancing from everyone. Whatever it is, I hope you just stay happy like how you are now, with yourself, your friends and even with him. Because I'd lost all hopes.


ANYWAY,

Admist all those thoughts that caused me some self implicted pain, I managed to continue to smile and be happy and I felt so much better after Invy's flying kiss. Tom, Matthew and Gabriel came back to SG to visit their friends today and us (Warren & I) and they can't stop talking about NS. But it was nice having seniors visiting you at work and the most important part is, we all got the donuts they bought! Hahaha.

We celebrated Yumi's birthday in advance today. Had steamboat and that mango cake from Breadtalk is AWESOME. I am full and I can't sit. 10 people have to wait for me to shit after dinner ended.

Hi Yumi, 3rd birthday I've celebrated with you and I hope you love it all the same. You are a friend so dear I will keep you in my heart. I just wish to see you happy, happy from the bottom of your heart again. And if he's someone who can give you the happiness, please go for it and not let anything stop you from it because at the end of the day, as long as you're happy, everyone, EVERYONE of us will be very happy for you and him as well. I wish you all the best. Stay happy as always. I love you many, muacksszxzxzx.

&&&&&&&,

to my dear SIP partner in crime, Pumpkin, sorry for being so bitchy to you at work all the time. Saying you're gay and just being a total bitch at work but at the end of the day, you know you are my handsomest Pumpkin and husband since yr 1 and thank you for being there for me at work all the time even when you got reprimanded by mei you niao because of what I'd done. Thank you for making me a better person. Thank you for rubbing my shoulders when I was about to blow off. Please read this and don't mention anything in my face the next time you see me because I think this is really mushy. LOL.

Finally I am going for some Starbucks session with Carmen tomorrow. I need to turn in soon.
(Sep 18, 2008)
()
I am beginning to hate guys. Fuck those broken promises.

I've moved on. You told me to and I did. All I wanted was to be like any other friends, go out have a nice dinner, a nice chat, have a platonic friendship. But everything was going downhill. I thought everything has ended nicely. All those feelings and whatnot but apparently the one that couldn't get over it was you. Are you afraid that I might still have that teeny weeny bit of feelings for you? I was disappointed because I thought you knew me better but I guess I made yet another wrong judgement. And in turn, you disappointed me with your actions, your words and your broken promises. In case you think that all those harsh words was out of anger, they were out of disappointment, sadness and because I really hated broken promises. And how long was the promised made regarding meeting up?

-

Anyway, dinner was still on with Chrys, Hakim, Issac and Donson. It was enjoyable and they were really tired. Donson dozed off while we were talking. Poor kids but at least they are getting their 1 month holidays.

Whatever it is, I will still be happier person after a nice long sleep which probably will be this coming Sunday. But Friday & Saturday are happening days so, I will be happy. I will still smile and be what Sun Onn and Invy said "the happy smiley girl".
(Sep 17, 2008)
I tried but not hard enough.
(Sep 16, 2008)
Only when you meet the worse you will learn to appreciate the best.

Thank you you, my ugly wonderful, smelly awesome and fat friendly producer.
(Sep 14, 2008)
i am a true loser, no?
(Sep 13, 2008)
(Sep 12, 2008)
TOMORROW

Free arcade games provided by The Days later @ Dobhy ghaut MRT - Zone X Arcade Center
The Days roadshow @ Marina Square 6pm
Please support!

Anyway, we had fun helping out in Invy's shoot today. We got to wear the new series of Nike windrunner and took some funny and gay pictures together which turned out to be freaking awesome because Johna got gay face and Warren got gay fingers.

The Days again with the rest and 85 after that. Awesome because I finally got my radar back on track. LOL.

Alright. Bathe and sleep. Nights bitches.
(Sep 10, 2008)
Busy busy day today. Studio 1 is so happening and food buying trip is not. Maryann is irritating. She tempted me by asking me to go into KFC with her )): and we ended up with a popcorn chicken meal instead of only a cup of ice lemon tea.

Anyway, I am excited about Sakae later on. Wee
(Sep 8, 2008)
Been so long since I felt so emo like tonight.

我们之间

"no matter how much you change, or remain the same. we'll love you for who you are please"

On a lighter note, talking to Shahul now makes me feel so much better. Take my mind of emo stuffs. Fyp fyp fyp. 5 more weeks to FYP and we are still on ground zero. GG to us but DA PHAM shall stick till the end no?

"Fiona is a very vulnerable person with a strong image that people like to look up to. But she is still on the journey of finding herself so that she can start to look up to herself as well."

Thanks Love, that made me emo again. But nonetheless, I love you all the same. And nothing will change the love for you since day one. (:
()
Tagged again by:
am0s

A) People who have been tagged must write their answers on their blogs; replace any question that they dislike with a new question formulated by themselves.

B) Tag 8 people to do this quiz; those who are tagged cannot refuse. These people must state who they were tagged by; cannot tag the person whom they were tagged by. Continue this game by sending it to other people.

Tagging : Yumi Nick Warren & 5 more imaginary friends

1. What are your nicknames?
Nehneh

2. What do you do before bedtime?
Read a storybook

3. What shampoo brand do you use?
I forgot what's the brand. What's the brand again?

4. What is your favorite scent?
DKNY (sorry I don't remember brands well)

5. What video games are you playing at the moment?
None

6. What do you eat the most?
Rice

7. Do you trust easily?
Yes.

8. What's the oldest piece of clothing in your wardrobe?
my primary school netball jersey.

9. Is there anything that has made you unhappy these days?
It was quite a long while ago.

10. Do you have a good body-image?
I slouch a lot.

11. Is being tagged fun?
Nope. I just wanna kill time.

12. What websites do you visit daily?
LJ, Blogger, FB, Friendster, trent.com

13. Who are currently the most important people to you?
My family

14. What kind of person do you think the person who tagged you is?
Someone who we can trust him with task.

15. What's the last song that got stuck in your head?
In the Ayer

16. What's your favorite item of clothing?
Graphic tee? I just spreed on Threadless USD9 and USD12 spree.

17. What's your all time favourite drink?
GREEN TEA

18. If you had $1,000 in cash, what would you do with it?
I'll probably spend it on food and a LG hp.

19. What items could you not go without during the day?
Little red riding hood (my hp) and Shroomy Temporary the Second (Pops's Ipod)

20. What do you want to buy right now?
LG hp

21. What personality trait do you wish you possess?
Good tempered and patience.



Oh well, I am so bored at work. We just swept the studio. Life lesson 3: always use a vaccum cleaner.
(Sep 7, 2008)
I feel accomplished today. I packed my room. Although there isn't much difference but oh well, I PACKED MY ROOM! And right now, behind me, just right up above my bed is the AO poster of 881 and The Days.



SMILES ((:

And my facebook is currently spammed with all the updates of The Days. Be it photo albums or tagging of people. But I had a good laugh at the photos of people vomiting and those scandalous photos of Xiao Liu and 1st AD *smirks*







My face is itching. I need to have a nice long shower. Let me see, I bathed this morning at 10.30am and now I'm going to bathe again at 3.35pm and probably before I sleep I am going to bathe again. Wha, waste water, waste shampoo, waste body soap, waste time.

What should I do after I shower? Should I load some show or should I just sit in front of the teevee and be a couch potato or maybe I should bake some brownies/cookies since I'm craving for it. But I am craving for sushi too. Should I make some sushi? Man, that is a lot of work. I need to but the ingredients, cook the rice and make it. By the time I'm done, I believe my craving for it will be long gone. So oh man, what should I do after my shower. I hate having nothing to do and most probably under such circumstances I will go to sleep but today's a Sunday and I am not going to waste my Sunday sleeping. This is so bitchy.

(I am craving for McFlurry now)

I think Mister J is really cute.
When will I see your face again, my 1990 boy.
(Sep 6, 2008)

Tried to steal some limelight from them ((:


Things are pretty much the same at work. I am excited about FYP yet I have no urge to return back to school. Like what Yumi said, "The lecturers said we will die to return to school during SIP," oh well, crap. How I wish I do not need to return back to school. Made no progression for my FYP other than getting myself a storyboardist and my camera man. Michael is still urging me to work on my story so to show him. Man, I am such a disappointment.

What else, I actually spent half of my day sleeping and the rest was used to laze around in bed, watching taiwan drama and reading storybook. When will I learn to fully utilize my everyday. Now I understand why Warren wakes up early everyday; because sleeping is wasting time. I was supposed to go E-Hub this afternoon and then Suntec in the evening.

(Momsie just came in and asked if I want to watch midnight movie later)

My good friends are now good friends of some other people already. Meh, so sad /:

I am so gonna turn gay soon because cute guys are stupid.
()
Tagged by Amos.
(Because I am a lazy bump who is very lazy to send out emails to people who asked, the questions are at the bottom)

Name-a-person-after-reading-the-question kind of thing.

1. Ester
2. Joshua Ang
3. Joseph Ang
4. Yumi
5. Ivy Lee
6. Yumi
7. Caleb/Tom
8. Weixiang
9. Sheena Chiang
10. Jacen
11. Carmen
12. Ester
13. Donson
14. Syafiq
15. Warren
16. Ester
17. Izak
18. Joshua Tan
19. Chrystal
20. Someone who has a unique view on life.
21. Someone S-type.
22. Someone M-type.
23. Ray Pang
24. Someone who would kill you if you got on their bad side.
25. Stephanie Chan
26. my cute boy from CE
27. Matthew Li
28. Mark Toh
29. NGAKUS
30. i am same same but different


1. Someone who seems to have a lot of close friends.
2. Someone you've known for a long time.
3. Someone you'd like to trade places with.
4. Someone who seems likely to be a member of the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals.
5. Someone who seems like a chatterbox.
6. Someone who seems to have a lot of wild ideas / fantasies.
7. Someone who seems like they were popular at school.
8. Someone you think you would have been close to if you went to school together.
9. Someone you want to stay up all night talking to.
10. Someone who can look after children.
11. Someone who seems to fall in love a lot.
12. A beauty.
13. Someone who seems like a celebrity.
14. Somone who is girly / manly
15. Someone you want to dress up as the opposite gender.
16. Someone grown-up.
17. Someone childlike.
18. Someone who is like a princess / prince.
19. Someone who seems capable.
20. Someone who has a unique view on life.
21. Someone S-type.
22. Someone M-type.
23. Someone you think of as your boss.
24. Someone who would kill you if you got on their bad side.
25. Someone who seems good at seduction.
26. Someone you think you could seduce.
27. Someone who loves with all their heart.
28. Someone you want to see in cosplay.
29. Someone you seriously want to go on a date with.
30. A message to all the above people
()


A nicer one taken from the photographer from CE and edited by Sufian.

Hearts <333
(Sep 5, 2008)
Prepping for Gala @ Work






Warren and Amy


Maryann and Amy


Warren with his hair down and Fiona


Maryann, Stan, Amy













































































































Random






Demi and Amy


Maryann and Stan


Ain and Jacen


Fiona and Warren


Fiona and Ain

With casts


Boss Steiner and Jason "Rat"


Fiona with Randy


Fiona with Alan "Parrot"


Fiona with Adora "Valerie"


Fiona with Ye Xiang "Xiao Liu" (Small Six)


Ivan "Baby", Fiona, Adora, Kelvin "Tau Per"


April, (same as above), Justin "Tai Zi", Anthony "Xiao Lao Da"

Red Carpet


Producers, Executive Producer


DOP Beng Huat, Wardrobe Meredith


Logistic Manager Andy


Sound recorder Patrick Chan


Hair Stylist


Film Editors from HK


Christine

Didn't manage to take the rest because we were too high. LOL.

TP @ Gala





Art Dept rocks
A big reunion. Wee.













On the way to Mac & at Mac





At St James


Ain with Derrick "Gao Kia"


Fiona with Derrick


Ain with Justin


Justin with Fiona


Justin with Verm


Adele with Fiona


Verm with Adele


Fiona with Maryann


And the best is always saved for the last,



WITH ROYSTON TAN. Stop telling me his sexual orientation because I like him for his talent ((:



Alright, have to get back to work already. Will upload the photos we took before Gala/during work later on ((: